 |
|
| » you are a nerd! | |
You know what's funny? Cliches are funny. Although I admit, that quite a lot of cliches are actually funny, most of them have a "hidden" truth. For instance: Rap music. I love rap music. But what's the deal with champagne, bitches and dogs? Take a random rapsong, and the topic will be probably one of the three I just mentioned. If you happen to listen to a DMX song, you prolly find all three in a single song. What about people saying, that women can't drive? It's not like someone came up with a totally insane idea to diss women. Like:"You know what? I'm gonna spread a rumor, that women can't drive cars properly. Wouldn't that be fun?". No! That cliche came up, because people got pissed off while driving in a car. When they passed the car that caused the trouble and looked who was driving, most of the time it was someone capable of becoming pregnant. Of course there are cliches about different groups of people: People who play a lot computer games are most likely nerds. Admit it, you are a nerd! Even if you are not an ugly nerd, you still are a nerd. Simply because you found this website here, you are qualified as a nerd. You love games, you think spongebob is funny, you know Spider-Man's real name and you know the name of Chewbaccas race. YOU ARE A NERD. Of course there are nerds, and there are geeks. Geeks are the ones, that make nerds look bad. Geeks are not only ugly, but they are morons too. They lack hygiene, they never dated a girl, they wear glasses and suspenders, they study some very boring stuff with computers and one day, they are rich motherfuckers with model girlfriends and a yacht. Let's stick to the nerds. Some nerds are cool. The ones that aren't cool, are probably on the cusp of being a geek. Cool nerds know relations between comic heros, they have rare uncut versions of action movies on DVD at home, they know lyrics of songs, that no one else knows and they are respected by normal people aswell as by geeks. Some nerds, stop being nerds, when they get a girlfriend and/or become engaged. Geek's refer to them as "lost to the real world". Some nerds stay nerds until they die. Nerds refer to them as the cool ones, the ones, that made it. They didn't go the usual way, they "kept it real". Some of those "wiseguys" work in Comic-Shops, most of them don't work at all though. Nerds always wonder where they got all the money from. Talking about money: The arch rival of the nerd is the spoiled rich guy. I'm not talking about the selfmade geek guy, I'm talking about guys, who own all the stuff thats cool, although they don't have a clue what to do with it. Most of them have the best equipment no matter what topic. They have the best snowboard, yet they don't manage to slide down a hill without breaking their ribs. They own a kickass PC, and probably think that "unzipping" is a porn-movie. They have a nice full-leather Spalding basketball, but they throw more airballs than Mr. Magoo. Some of them are arrogant assholes, some of them are actually nice. Nerds hate them nevertheless, because they are happy. Happy people are the most hated group in the world, right after Al-Qaida and the Pet Shop Boys. Although nerds hate the spoiled rich guys, some nerds are even friends with them. Thats mostly the case, because the spoiled rich guys kinda admire the nerds. They think of nerds as the cool or funny guys. Mostly the nerds tell the rich guys something cool, and the rich spoiled guys are the ones that buy it. Do the math: How would a rich spoiled guy know, what snowboard is good, if not a badass snowboard nerd would've told him? Right! So the nerd and the spoiled rich guy sometimes join their forces. Of course the nerd has a benefit of that relation too. He is invited to the partys and is introduced to chicks. Now as I already mentioned, this might get tricky, because a chick "can" be the end of the nerd entitiy. Let's not forget the intellectuals. These strange people are kind of a mix between the nerds and the geeks. They are smart motherfuckers but some of them dress nice. They know some stuff, that the nerds know, but to most they refer as "childish" or "useless". Nerds respect intellectuals, because they give them ideas. Like: "Ever wondered why we wear helmets to do dangerous stuff, instead of avoiding dangerous stuff, so we wouldn't need to wear helmets?". Nerds are sometimes confused by stuff the intellectuals say, but since they are uber-intelligent, they are probably right. Intellectuals know crazy shit. They sometimes scare people with the strange things they say. The difference to the geeks is, that intellectuals won't become rich. Don't confuse intellectuals with pseudo-intellectuals though. Pseudo-Intellectuals don't know shit, but they pretend to know everything. They want to let people know, that they are "intelligent". Most of the time they do the opposite of what is popular. If they read a popular column in the internet, and 90 percent of the people like it, they are the ones that write: This colum is a load of bullshit. You are wrong, and not funny. Please watch cartoons to increase your mental state. |
|
| © Etienne Gardé am 11.05.2004 | |